I’ve long memek been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in porn a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the memek delectable French word for memek caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, crot she rolled her eyes memek and bokep declared the woman an ‘actrice’, bokep or crot sex worker.

Now, bokep according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokep it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and bokep bokeh all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, memek the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other bokep memek words, crot you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: memek there’s sex as performance art, crot and memek sex as genuine intimacy. And crot when a woman is genuinely aroused, crot trusts her partner and crot is not fearing for porn a bokeh fragile male ego, bokep she’s far more likely to gently sigh and crot moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, porn female contributors crot regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, porn they’d explain, memek so they could make their partner feel happy, porn while conserving their energy for crot other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of bokep Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and bokeh ‘manipulation’, porn and porn that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, crot so to bokeh speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: bokeh ‘I’m enjoying this, bokep but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, crot ladies?

The only other reason to screech like bokep a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, memek memek where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland porn said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their bokeh TVs: porn ‘As far as I’m concerned, bokep that’s porn what you should be doing.’

Well, crot only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, bokep Sex At Dawn, crot Christopher Ryan and bokeh Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy bokeh during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and memek keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, porn I can understand porn the need bokep to advertise. But if you’re not, bokeh then men should take heed: memek the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris